Goldilocks Buys a Bed

I’m telling ya, nothing’s easy.  The Princess and I decided to replace the bed in the guest bedroom, and since I sleep in it more than she does (for reasons not to be discussed here), she allowed as I should be the one to choose the new mattress and box springs.  Thanks a lot!  Buying a bed, that’s a big decision, you know the place where you spend seven eight hours a day for maybe 15 years.  And talk about confusing; its like trying to make sense out of your cable bill.  There are ump de ump manufacturers with multiple lines of beds in a zillion price ranges and made of different kinds of materials, including memory foam?  Man, where can I get some of that, to stuff in my head.  Here are the various lines available from just one manufacturer, Simmons Beautyrest:  Pemberton, Verona, World Class Elderberry, Naomi Yvonne, Coseta, Sasha, Natalia, Ava, Joelle and Celine.  Just guessing here, but I’ll bet most bedding decisions are made by men.  They used no less than 8 women’s names there, no Jake or Bruno, what, no Red Pony line?  To make matters worse, just for example, within the World Class Elderberry Line there are six different choices. 

And from this next thing I guess you’ll get a picture of how long I’ve been out of the bed market.  What ever happened to the mattress that you can flip, so that both sides can be used, thus extending the life of the mattress.  Somewhere where along the line the mattress manufacturers decided, hey, let’s put a “pillow top” on one side, or just a fancy tufted top and leave the other side unfinished.  By doing this, mattresses will last half as long as they used to, and we’ll double our sales.  Woo hoooo!

So, in the Sunday paper a while back I saw Macy’s was having a big mattress sale.  I said to the Princess, “This is perfect, let’s go over and see if they’ve got something that will work, but let’s be careful; if they don’t have exactly what we want, we’ll just walk away.”  So, I planked out on all kinds of beds, I thought being pretty careful, taking my time, and decided on one that was in our price range, and it felt pretty good.

A couple of weeks later, the thing was delivered and with great anticipation I dove in for my first night in the new bed.  I hated it.  Much to firm.  I felt like the damn thing was trying to push me off, out onto the floor.  Huge mistake!  The Princess was really helpful.  “You’re on your own on this one, mister.”  

Ok, so back to Macy’s, this time by myself.  I explained the situation, that I wanted to exercise the one-time option of exchanging the bed for another and that, hey, the box spring was damaged to boot.  The guys in the show room worked a deal for me and waived the usual exchange fees (about $250).  So great, it was back to the beds to this time find just the right one.  Since the first one was too firm, this time I went for something nice and soft.  I was waffling between two mattresses when one of the guys said,  “Ya know, that one you’re on there, an extremely pregnant woman who returned a bed like you did, she went for that one.  Case closed!  I went for it.

Two weeks later, the new bed was delivered.  This time some gorillas showed-up, banging into walls, leaving scuff marks here and there, knocking over an antique (minor damage) and once again, the box spring is damaged (but not as bad).  So “ok,” I called customer service.  A really nice lady asked, “Do you think the damage is worth more than $200?”  I said, well no, and she popped a check for $200 in the mail.  That was pretty cool and I thought a very professional way of dealing with an unpleasant experience.  But speaking of unpleasant, Jeez, the new bed felt weird.  I tried it a few nights, and although I sank down to a level where I needed a snorkel to breath, I did get used to it after a few nights.  Then our son, Andy, showed up for a visit.  He slept in the bed, and after just two nights bailed out.  Actually, he said he kind of rolled up out of it and then bailed.  Oh man, now what?

So, back into the store, where one of the guys, very understanding, called Customer Service from the showroom and plead my case.  I was lying on a nice, comfortable mattress (I think her name was “Natalia”) when he came back.  “I have a little bad news, the exchange deal is a one-time thing only.  We can’t help you.”  A LITTLE  bad news?  I literally took it lying down, but sheesh, why not just send me out for a back brace and say good luck with that FOR THE NEXT TWENTY YEARS?

What the heck am I gonna do?  I decided that in spite of the initial NO from Customer Service, and hoping for a miracle, I’d try pleading my case with Macy’s myself.  Holy cow, a miracle!  They granted me another do-over.  Let me just say here, Macy’s is an amazing store with FABULOUS CUSTOMER SERVICE (Ok guys, does that cover my side of the bargain?).

Alright, so now the pressure is really on.  I’m pretty sure there’ll be no more miracles, and I’m heading back in to Macy’s next week.  I’m really nervous.  How will I even relax on the beds under the pressure.  What if I end-up falling for “Celine”?  What will The Princess think?  For sure, I’m going to screw this up.  Will the next bed be “just right?”  Stay tuned…

Right about now you “tractor heads” are fidgeting kind of like the Idiotic Brother and wondering, Hey, what about the Pony, now that he’s in that nice, cozy garage?  Any progress?  You betcha.  The radiator and starter were installed this week.  Take a look at these two shots.

I’ve got a short piece of radiator hose to attach, and then the radiator install will be complete.  I’m working on getting a number of things painted, waiting for a nice, calm, warm day; the gas tank and bracket are two of them. 

On Friday The Princess and I made another trip down to Siler City for tractor stuff.  Just in case you think I make ALL of this stuff up, I snapped a photo of that sign I mentioned in the July 15 post (click on the date to view that “oldie but goodie).
Have a greet week everyone, and thanks for reading.


2 responses to “Goldilocks Buys a Bed

  1. I sleep on that mattress fairly often, too, and I think my opinion should work into your decision. I do not want it soft, but jjjuuuuuusssstttt firm enough. Got that?

    I will be on it Dec. 25, so choose wisely!

    Thanks.and love,


  2. I can SO relate to your mattress shopping saga! About 10 yrs. ago I purchased one of those much advertised Sleep Number beds. After a couple of years I suddenly found myself sleeping at a “tilt”. Those beds are great…as long as the air mattress part doesn’t spring a leak. I was unable to locate the leak. Since I had purchased it through QVC (remember when you, Cindy and I toured that place), I didn’t think the local store at the mall would help me on this. One morning I had just “had it” and managed to get the thing apart and into 5 large leaf bags and to the curb for the trash pickup. I’m o.k. with the replacement but think there are too many makes and styles for anyone to make a decision they will be happy with for the long haul. Happy zzzzzzzzz’s!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s