Forty Years of Deception and Conflict

I have no one overriding subject this week, just various little things that have been building up in the idiotic brain.  Like, for example, the Italian economy.  What’s wrong with you people; don’t you ever listen to me.  I asked you  (nicely) in a recent post to spend more money in Italy, because its economy was just barely grinding along.  Even if you did, I guess it was too little too late, because this week the Wall Street Journal reported that Italy has officially slipped back into recession.  Now listen, you can make up for not taking the Idiotic author’s advice seriously.  Go on line, buy a complete, Campagnolo Super Record, electronic, Ergo-shift, component “groupo” for my bike and send it to me.  You’ll make a lot of people happy, especially me!

The Princess and I were driving somewhere last week.  I had the radio on, and it’s my habit to turn it off whenever the news comes on; it’s just too awful.  This time I was a little late, and just before I cut it off the phrase “40 years of deception and conflict” came across.  The Princess, never missing an opportunity to give me a shot said, “Well that just about sums it up for me.”  I was ready for her though and retorted, “Oh come on, you’re well aware we’ve been married for more like 45!

I was out doing some more painting on the Pony.  The left rear axle housing is now done, and I’m within one coat of being done with the that left rear wheel.  Here are a couple of pics.

I think the Camry looks pretty good with the Pony wheel in front, don’t you?

The Camry photo reminds me, I often pick-up ticks when out painting in the drive.  It is now confirmed that the Lone Star tick can cause a person to become severely allergic to red meat.  So, if you enjoy hamburgers like I do, be damn careful out in the woods.  I’m not kidding, get some spray with DEET and use it!  And it seems this week that one topic just leads to another.  How about that chikungunya!  That’s the mosquito-spread virus that has been gradually trying to take hold in the US.  The media tried to scare us recently by reporting a case in South Carolina even though the dude picked it up in Haiti.  Me, I just like saying chikungunya…chikungunya, chickunguya, chikungunya!  And holy cow, the hysteria over Ebola is breathtaking.  They’ve got me so scared, I’m no longer reading emails from Africa, even the ones that offer “incredible investment opportunities.”

Public Service Announcement
If you have OCD, or even tend toward that affliction do not under any circumstances buy a Fitbit.  I’m talking about the little device that keeps track of how many steps you take, records them on your mobile device, flashes lights and vibrates (not even going there) at milestones, sends you little notes of encouragement, presents “badges” for achieving goals and, in general, ends up defining your life by how many steps you take.  I’m not going to try to be funny about this, because Raleigh native David Sedaris has already written most humorously on this subject (see New Yorker article dated June 30, 2014).  But I will tell you how the Fitbit has changed things around here.

Several weeks ago The Princess bought a Fitbit and had one sent to our son, Andy, as well.  They had both recently begun informal fitness programs, so it seemed a good idea.  In no time, all I heard from The Princess was how the Fitbit was cheating her out of steps, how “the damn thing wouldn’t light-up when she expected and worst of all how she wasn’t getting the “buzz” for doing 10,000 steps.  Well, I thought (most definitely keeping it to myself) you do actually have to walk the 10,000 steps.

Eventually, it became clear to her that she couldn’t achieve the goals by just painting in her studio, doing the puzzles in the daily paper and watching QVC.  That’s when the serious walking started.  She practically cried the first day she got 10,000 steps and the damn vibrator didn’t go off (the battery was low)!  I’ve got to give her credit, she’s getting in a lot of steps now.  Unfortunately, and here’s the downside, stuff that doesn’t yield lots of steps, like say doing dishes, is even less popular now.  I made the mistake one evening of offering to do the dishes while she went out walking.  Dammit, she called my bluff on that one!

Last week Andy was visiting.  Between the two of them it wore me out just watching them.  The Princess got in 14,000 steps one day.  And holy cow, I hadn’t seen Andy run since he was maybe 6, but one night he was out after dark, running under the street lights, just so he could get in his 10,000 steps.  I’m sure glad they had each other though, because I’m still “milking” that broken toe and getting in a lot of bench time.

But watch out, yesterday I broke down and bought “the bit.”  Comedy ensued when trying to set up my Fitbit account.  I got our Fitbits mixed up and got credit in my account for the Princess’s 11,000 steps.  When I told Andy about the screw up, with legitimate worry in his voice he said, “Oh man, mom’s really going to be pissed!”  Andy called from New  York Friday night.  He was out walking along the East River and wanted to brag that he was in the process of nailing down his first 20,000 step day.  Be careful people, not everyone can handle the Fitbit responsibly.

The Princess walked out wearing Fitbit,
and racked-up her steps like a nitwit.
What a mess it was
When she missed the buzz.
Her Fitbit had died, oh shit!

Have a wonderful week, and thanks for reading.

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s